Dave, if we are all clones
Dave, if we are all clones….why are you so short?
(Star Wars Stormtroopers)
picture: storm troopers. lol caption: Grimmiekins
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Cheezburger Network Blog-
Impostor!!!
Just a little accident with a uterine replicator….
What the hell are these things?
A billion people have just screamed in terror and were suddenly silenced.
Not even all of them were Star Wars fans, it’s just everybody knows what these are.
You don’t exist.
mmmmmmmmmmKay. Just cuz I don’t ‘follow’ the masses and get excited about something that is idiotic to me? Hmmm…..
…well, you can just bite me!
There’s “not following the masses” and then there’s “being totally ignorant of all modern culture for the last 30 years.”
.
You’re the latter.
Maybe she’s homeschooled.
I was homeschooled, and I knew who these guys were in the fifth grade.
Wow! dick, you are the other imbecile I forgot to mention.
Okay, but seriously, where the hell do you live where you don’t
know about Star Wars?
No, homeschoolers are smarter than that.
I think she’s just a poser culture snob.
why tha hell is your name dick are you a dick
I am sorry that I don’t find the movies remotely interesting just because an idiot like you does. Now, go away.
You don’t have to like movies to know who these are. Their merchindice is EVERYWHERE!
I’m glad I’m not an ignorant savage like you. Hoor.
HOOR??? ITS W H O R E!!!!!
SLAGgingham how can you call someone a ignorant savage.
the only reason why you make fun of people online is because you are a douche.
get over yourself.
you make me laugh like i just laughed my ass off and why would you say that??
Everyone takes the piss of star wars now….. get with the programme old man
dude you must really have no life.. starting arguements over the internet isn’t going to get you chicks.
What about all the hot young coeds? They send me videos every week for $19.95
is this in your imaginary world?
I’m one of those people.
And yeah, they’re not clones.
technically they are the clones from when order 66 was given out and the empire was formed, just diff armor.
im sorry that im not as samrt as you and i cant understand nerd!!!!!!!!!!!!
We can tell that you’re not smart. Your poor use of grammar and spelling prove that.
They might not be, a lot of them got killed.
Most legions hired regular humans to join.
Only the 501st Legion remained all clones,
because they didn’t get killed as often.
How do you KNOW that?!
many people study these things…they’re the elite guard of our organization…
actually, they’re not clones. after order 66 was given out, the emperor did away with the clones and started recruting across the galexy. Han solo was going to become a stormtrooper before he got into smuggling. That’s how han knew about the garbage dump in the empire strikes back
They’re clones of Jango Fett. Didja miss that Episode 2? I wouldn’t blame you.
Well, to be perfectly accurate, only 1/8 of them are clones of Jango Fett by Episode 4. There was an uprising on Kamino using the Republic style clones to fight the stormtroopers that caused the Empire to use 8 (I think) different templates, including Jango’s.
That is if Star Wars Battlefront II is considered canon…
It is canon that they stopped cloning jango, and only cloned there best troops, including ones who weren’t clones to begin with.
Just because leila doesnt get an erection over these things like you obviously do doesn’t mean that she doesnt exist
I don’t know what the hell they are either. I gather that they are from Star Wars – is that right? I fell asleep half an hour into the first movie and that was it for me. Life is too short to bother with learning all the minutiae involved in pop culture directed at dweebs.
wow, i hate star wars, and i even know what they are, somone has been living in a closet for a long, long time
STFU bobby,
you’re “so far in the closet” you’re “having adventures in Narnia.”
LOL!
I hate to expose my geekiness for all to see, but…
In the original trilogy, no on ever says the Storm Troopers are clones.
The Prequel ones ARE clones.
The ANH ones under Empire are regular people.
… they’d be like 60 years old be then, right?
Yeah, I don’t think they specifically got rid of the clone soldiers, but the Empire’s army is totally open to whoever wants to join (as their bad aim proves). Although there’s a good change a lot of the high ranking officers (well, the ones still in stormtrooper suits) are probably clones.
If I recall, much of the bad aim was due to the cheap E-11 rifles that troopers carried. it’s near impossible to be a crack shot with a weapon whose angle of fire may vary as much as ten degrees from one shot to the next.
actually, according to SW Battlefront game there were some original clones from the clone wars who have been serving at the second Death Star at the time it was blown up by Lando Calrissian.
Due to growth acceleration clones were only about 10 years old at the start of the clone wars. The war itself was about 4 years and then 20 more years until episode IV events, and 3 more years after that until episode VI events. So the clones were about 10+4+20+3=37 years old. But, yes, counting the growth acceleration used on them they would have appeared about twice their age.
P.S. To all the nerd haters out there. Before you tell me to get a life, I’ll tell you that I own a 400K house and drive a 50K Lexus, have a beautiful wife and daughter, an interesting and rewarding job which includes business class traveling all around the world, and, yes, I am still a Star Wars nerd!
Woo! Go Star Wars nerds!
Hear hear!
Not to mention anyone who’s looking at this site should be telling anyone else to get a life
so totally this.
I like your preemptive defense.
“… they’d be like 60 years old be then, right?”
More like 30, but they would physically be about 60 since they age about twice as fast as regular humans.
But as others have said, by the time of the events of ANH, most of the stormtroopers were just regular people.
Not to sound like a complete nerd, but at this point in time, the Empire storm trooper military was open to enlistment by anyone.
At least that’s how Lucas explains it.
Also, the question that I’ve heard asked before: If parsec is a unit of measure, how did Han Solo do the Kessel run in less than 12 parsecs?
Thats like saying “I drove to San Francisco in less than 50 miles.”
Explanation: The Kessel run is a trade route through a very dangerous area with asteroids and black holes. You cannot fly a straight line through it.
You must weave and dodge various hazards.
Most traders would travel the route in 18+ parsecs, based on how far around objects they had to fly.
Han did it in under 12 because his ship was more agile and he was able to get closer to black holes and such.
TAKE THAT, FAMILY GUY!
“Not to sound like a complete nerd”, Fail.
Being a total bitch win.
Ownage win.
c-c-c-c-combo breaker!
Hey I’m not a complete nerd. About 93%… Almost there…
I think that’s just Lucas backpedaling so he doesn’t look like an idiot.
Yeah, but it’s fiction. Backpedaling is always 100% legit in fiction, especially if it makes sense.
Haha you got that right.
Backpedalling? In sci-fi??
Yeah. You can tell a “reasonable” Star Wars fan by whether or not they’ll admit that George Lucas is a self-important jerk who concocts ridiculous retcons to make his continuity “grander”. Shut up, George; we know you didn’t have the whole “grand plan” plotted out before you made Episode IV: A New Hope, which was neither labeled as Episode IV nor A New Hope when it was first released.
The universe and half the movies — give or take — are good stuff. That George Lucas is in any way responsible is a coincidence.
Also, that was more than I intended to write.
I agree with you Jojo.
I do not understand why people think that storm troopers are clones.
Why else would Luke goto the Imperial Academy?
Many of the novels agree with this notion. At least one tracks a man’s progression through the ranks.
In that case, it was pretty irrelevant in a conversation about how fast he could get to Alderaan.
You know, you’re completely right.
It is relevant actually. Less distance to travel = less time.
It was less agility and more sensor distortion due to the ship’s proximity to one or more of the black holes. The whole trip took significantly longer than the average Kessel run, due to stops (if I remember correctly) at Kessel and the Maw Installation and to make a certain rescue, so the claim is mostly bunk anyway. The story is certainly worthwhile, though, and is laid out in Brian Daley’s ‘The Han Solo Adventures’.
Aren’t you a little short for a stormtrooper?
When movies overlap, Part Two: Star Wars and Lord of The Rings.
The dwarves have joined the Stormtroopers.
You just caused a nerd party somewhere.
I attended!
Nerd orgy*
O_o;;
i am laughed so hard at the mental picture that comment just caused.
damn you, now everyone at work is looking at me weird
*i laughed* not *i am laughed*
sp fail……….
*scoots away ashamed*
Grammar, actually.
(…says a guy who regularly reads and enjoys ICHC and all its little friends.)
NERD ALERT
Yeah, it’s about to get really geeky in here…
Anyway, the clone production was stopped because they were so easy to abuse (in terms of taking control of them) and regular people became Storm Troopers.
You know what they say…KNOWLEDGE IS POWER!
Oooooh i love a good nerd! Nerds are HAWT!! bring ‘em all to me! bring ‘em!
To be a nerd of a different color, identical twins aren’t always exactly the same height, even though they are genetically identical. Growth depends a lot on development in the womb and even childhood nutrition and illness and such. As much as Henry Ford’s assembly line approach revolutionized our society, genetics and other natural phenomena are still WAY more sophisticated, complex, and, well… messy.
Clones grown in test tubes, not twins.
Yes but clones are genetically identical to the parent and identical twins are genetically identical to each other so the idea is the same. Environmental variation plays a key part in the development of people
You’re right, but the cloning facilities strove to create an environment that would give the smallest margin to natural differences in the clones.
It was a highly controlled environment.
A scientific experiment showed that if there re 6 rats in a cage and they must swim underwater to get food, 2 get food for themselves while 2 get food only to have it stolen by the last 2. If you put a rat in another cage with 5 new rats, his behavior may change (eg. he may switch from victim to thief), so it is impossible to have, say, 6 independent rats (the ones getting food for themselves).
This shows within a group individuals always differ, and I doubt even the Kamino could avoid that.
1… 2… 3… 4… 5… GOD DAMNIT! Can you all stop moving for a second!? I think I counted one of you TWICE!
irobot reference win
Leaving aside developmental biology issues (just having the same genes doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll grow up exactly the same), no one said they were all clones of the same person.
/geek
What I want to know is, if these guys were around 20+ years after the clone troopers, how come their uniforms are so much lamer?
Because almost everything that Lucas does is an afterthought.
He really should have started at episode 1. The sleek, beautiful starships would have been featured in the modern episodes, not in the older ones. And the clunky, boxy starships that really resemble cars from the 80s would have been featured in the older episodes, as they rightly should have.
Look at automobile design for the last 50 years.
We didn’t start out sleek and high tech, we started out clunky and squarish.
Even before the new movies were made, wasn’t old republic technology considered superior to what was around at the time of the 4, 5, 6 movies? Their civilization was going through a relative dark ages at the time of 4, 5, and 6.
They are all clones of the same person. Go back and watch ep 2 again.
blood. shut. up.
If you’re going to talk about star wars, do your homework first.
According to official ’star wars’ canon, the Empire eventually recruited regular humans to fill the ranks of its massive army. So, who even says that any of these guys are clones?
I find it hilarious that you obviously have no idea what you are talking about- yet you are trying to sound like an expert.
Prequels = CLONE troopers, they age faster than normal humans, and weren’t in use so much by the original trilogy, hence the name STORM troopers, because they’re no longer all clones. It’s that simple. This is not a 66 comment argument. If you care to know more, just go to wookieepedia.com and look it up, then STFU.
Also caption creator fails.
Actually, at the time of new hope, last clone troopers were the 501st legion, known also as “vader’s fist”. Rest of the trooper were normal, academy trained humans.
because storm troopers =/= clone troopers
well you see….i remember reading in a book i had….that the cloning technology was lost after a while, during the empire’s rule. later on, luke and crew found a fleet of remaining clone troopers and cloning equipment drifting in space.
Episode 4-6 ftw
Yeah except that these are stormtroopers. not clones.